At the same time, I began noticing changes within myself. No, there were not beautiful nor “spiritual.” I started noticing very concrete changes. I started seeing how the mechanics of my own personality work. How skillful it can be. Made me laugh today acutally! How it can hide manipulatively in a little cave, and then politely hang a sign outside saying: “I’m hiding here, just so you know.” Almost honest. Almost transparent. Almost innocent. This time, no one came in into the cave I built, and the emotional process itself passed too quickly this time.  I really don't care anymore. There was no reason to keep hiding. But I know with certainty: that step was needed. Not for me. For someone else, to realize something about themselves, not through words, but through the absence of movement, absence of information.

When it’s not stories that repeat, but states

The longer I watch, the clearer it becomes: what’s repeating now are not destinies, but archetypal inner positions. People who have never met find themselves in the same internal places. Some are holding onto form, some onto roles, some onto an idea of themselves that has long since lost life. And almost everyone feels the same thing! THAT the old ways no longer work, and the new ones are not yet formed. This is not a crisis of choice. NO! NO! NO! It is a crisis of identity. Not “what should I do,” but who am I actually living as.

A conjunction that is not about romance and not about chaos

Many are now talking about the conjunction of Saturn and Neptune at zero degrees of Aries. IT NEVER HAPPENED LIKE THIS! And this is not the case where mysticism is added for effect. Similar conjunctions occur roughly once every thirty-six years and always coincide with major shifts of eras. Last time it was in 1980s, USSR collapsed among other "systems", but the conjuction was in 1 degrees of Aries. not ZERO! But if before systems, ideologies, and states collapsed, now the image of the human being collapses.

Neptune is illusion, faith without form, collective sleep, the desire to be “good,” “spiritual,” “right,” without embodying it in reality. Saturn is form, responsibility, limits, law, adulthood, the concrete “I am accountable.” They also say that Saturn is like that karmic debt collector, like that Death figure with a sickle... Watch out here! especially if you are "sleeping" for the most part. 

When they meet at zero degrees of Aries, the starting point of the zodiac, continuing by inertia becomes impossible. The past no longer works here. Justifications are not accepted. Trauma can no longer be used as an excuse. Aries does not ask why. It asks simply: are you real or are you performing (just talking head here)?

Why this is so hard to live through

Because this conjunction does not destroy from the outside. It turns off the inner theater. It strips masks, even the most refined ones. It makes self-deception impossible. It resets roles, statuses, and habitual identities. And it demands one thing: the real embodiment of what you claimed to believe in for years. This is not going to be a time of empty promises. This era is done. Either you are, or you are not.  For those who lived a “normal life” while betraying themselves, for those who preferred uncomfortable "comfort", for those who spoke correct words without inner support, for those who hid behind this uncomfortable "comfort", family, roles, or spiritual concepts....  an inner collapse begins. Probably already began.  The world is not cruel. Your performance is over.

Timing: when this actually happens

This is not a single day or a single date. They say it is in February... The process is already underway anyhow. It began earlier, as growing intolerance toward falseness and a strange heaviness attached to everything “the old way.” The peak of the conjunction falls within a near-term window when Saturn and Neptune are closest at zero degrees of Aries. This is a period when reality responds quickly, and consequences of choices become visible almost immediately. The weeks before and after are highly sensitive... old structures dissolve, new ones have not yet taken shape. It is a moment of truth and not a catastrophe.

How this looks in real people

I observe how this transit is lived through by three very different people. They do not form a story nor they are not part of one narrative. What unites them is this: they are in different phases of the same process.

One person has already moved beyond the old form and can no longer return to it, even if they try. There is no desire to explain, prove, or hold on, or wait. They simply stopped agreeing to live half a life. Half-assed truths, versions of the truth... 

Another person stands at the threshold. They feel that the old no longer lives, but fear of consequences, a sense of duty, and lack of inner grounding make the step almost impossible. Especially when the heart center and the G center are open, when identity and direction are read through others instead of sourced from within. Without cultivated attention, such transitions are experienced as paralysis.

The third person holds the structure. The form. The agreement. Not because there is life there, but because losing the form feels like losing oneself. Control activates. Appeals to obligation. Attempts to stop what is inevitable. 

So, if the second is in the field of the third - woa! I could see the guilt resonance and paralysis. Even though this time won't be waiting for anyone's readiness. If you "see" what is happening, then you might overcome the threshold. 

This is not about relationships. It is about different levels of readiness for truth.

What this transit ultimately does

It does not expose others. It simply ends self-deception. Everything false becomes heavy. Everything true demands action. Living halfway becomes impossible. The body becomes the main detector of lies. Solitude becomes cleaner than false closeness and intimacy. For those who choose truth, this is a time of strength. For those who cling to masks, it is a time of exhaustion and potential leaving this incarnation. 

Why I am not afraid of this time

Because for me this is not destruction... I see it as a permission! Permission to no longer be convenient. To stop shrinking. To stop hiding scale. To stop waiting. To stop explaining what is obvious.

This is the end of the era of “I know, but I don’t live it.”  And the beginning of a life where knowledge without action is no longer considered knowledge. Enough of lies. Not others’... my own.  And it seems this is exactly why everything converges now. 

Transit from February 2 to February 7

13 — Gate of the Listener
7 — Gate of the Self Role

A period of quiet and cautious action gives way to a more active phase. This is the right time to bring order into your life in the broadest sense of the word: systematize, optimize, clean up, filter out what is unnecessary, and build a clear structure for maximum efficiency.

This is a period of logic, organization, and service. Service, by the way, is not limited to things, people can serve as well. It is important not to view service as something negative or compulsory... service can be offered in the name of something meaningful… or simply as circumstances allow.

It would also be useful to clarify what your goals are, as well as the goals of those around you. If you notice that your path is built correctly, logically, and supported by a sincere desire to walk it, be prepared for people to be drawn to you. You may not need to push them away, instead, you can naturally and successfully protect them and step into a leadership role. Overall, this is a suitable time for unification, taking risks, establishing order, and initiating new beginnings. Be sincere, logical, and unbiased, and try to find a harmonious place in your life for everything that enters it.

Helpful:
Leadership qualities, discipline, the ability to learn from your mistakes and listen to others, recognizing your emotions and expressing them appropriately.

Challenging:
Separation, jealousy, pessimism, indifference, envy.