In the new reality, a transition is taking place. And I see it everywhere I look, among my friends and family, among people I work with, among people I dine with like my neighbors in the forest... you can no longer get away with living against your heart, refusing to choose, refusing to feel. That’s it! We’ve arrived... Either crawl back into 3D, though you won’t be able to, you won’t endure it, you would sooner die, or accept the new rules of the game.

Every time you choose sex without an energetic attunement to your partner’s Spirit, you violate yourself. And by “attunement”, I do not simply mean attraction, physical compatibility, or even love in the ordinary sense. I mean that deeper inner recognition when your body, your heart, your desire, and something beyond your conscious mind are all saying yes to the same person at the same time.

We have been taught that the body can somehow be separated from the rest of us. That we can give someone access to the body while withholding the heart. That we can have sex because we are married, because it has been too long, because our partner needs it, because we are lonely, because we are afraid they will leave, because this is what couples are supposed to do, or simply because the body is capable of performing the act. But the body is not an object we lend to another person. It participates in every encounter. It remembers, it responds, it opens or contracts. And sometimes it says no long before the conscious mind is willing to hear it, because "we've been together for so long"...

There is a particular kind of inner splitting that happens when the body is participating in intimacy while the deeper self is absent from it. You can kiss someone and feel nothing (in your soul). You can allow yourself to be touched while internally moving farther and farther away. You can even experience physical arousal or orgasm and still feel strangely empty afterward, because physiological response and inner consent are not always the same thing. The body can respond mechanically while the heart remains closed and the Spirit refuses the encounter.

And this is where sex can become a form of self-betrayal even when no external force is involved. You may be the one who said yes. You may have initiated it, because your body "felt arousal". You may love the person. You may have shared a life with them for twenty or so years. Yet somewhere inside you there can still be a quiet, unmistakable no that you keep overriding. Each time you override it, you teach yourself that maintaining the relationship, fulfilling the role, avoiding conflict, or meeting another person’s needs matters more than remaining faithful to what you actually feel.

Sex is one of the most powerful forms of energetic exchange available to us. I would say that it is the closest two embodied human beings can come to dissolving the illusion of separation without leaving the body. Two separate nervous systems, two histories, two fields of memory, two bodies, two masculine and feminine currents meet in a single experience... and for a moment, the boundary between “me” and “you” becomes permeable... You have unity on all three levels - mind, body and spirit. I have always treated sex as a process. Sex for me always started long before the actual act itself... It is where you start "seeing" without your eyes - can you consume him? can he consume you? ALL? 

This is why I cannot see sex as merely a physical act. Something is exchanged there that goes far beyond touch, pleasure, orgasm, or reproduction. We enter each other’s emotional and energetic fields. We bring into that space everything we carry: our love and fear, our wounds and longing, our shame, tenderness, hunger, grief, power, darkness, light. Sex does not happen only between two bodies. It happens between two entire inner worlds.

And when both people are deeply connected to themselves, when neither is abandoning their own truth in order to enter the other, something extraordinary becomes possible. Sex stops being simply an exchange of pleasure and becomes a meeting place of consciousness. The body becomes the doorway rather than the destination.

There are moments in this kind of union when ordinary perception changes. Time seems to disappear. The edges of the body soften. Thought becomes quiet. The distinction between giving and receiving begins to dissolve. You are no longer trying to get something from another person or perform something for them. You are participating in something larger than either of you. 

This is what I mean when I say that sex can become a spiritual practice. The world around us sometimes feels almost suspended now, thick like jelly, as though we are living between realities and the old movement of time no longer carries us forward in the same way. Sex can become one of the passages through that suspended state, out of separation and into union, out of the endless activity of the mind and into the direct experience of being alive, out of the isolated self and into the dance of energies, into connection with the Higher Self and the Source.

When two people who are each connected to their Higher Self enter this space together, they do more than meet.... they amplify one another. Each becomes both mirror and catalyst for the other. What one person cannot see alone may suddenly become visible in the presence of the other. What has been buried can rise. What has been defended can soften. What has been fragmented can begin to come back into wholeness.

And this includes Darkness! True spiritual intimacy does not mean that two perfectly healed people meet in some permanently elevated vibration. Quite the opposite... Intimacy inevitably brings us into contact with what has not yet been healed: fear of abandonment, fear of surrender, shame around desire, hunger for control, the terror of being truly seen, old wounds around masculine and feminine, power and vulnerability, giving and receiving. The other person touches places inside us that we often cannot reach alone.

But when there is love, consciousness, and deep energetic attunement, we do not have to destroy each other with what emerges there. We can hold it, witness it, move through it. Your Darkness can illuminate something hidden in me... and my Darkness can reveal something hidden in you... And instead of unconsciously acting these wounds out against one another, we can bring them into awareness together. 

Then sexual energy becomes more than desire. It becomes an enormous creative force available for transformation. Available for healing. 

Two people do not simply add their energy together. They create a field between them...  something that belongs fully to neither one and yet is generated by both. And inside that field, the movement toward consciousness can accelerate. Each person becomes a kind of energetic amplifier for the other. We exchange, awaken, reveal, challenge, soften and sometimes heal one another, while masculine and feminine currents meet not only through the body, but at the level of Spirit.

This is also what I mean when I say that during sex we enter one another’s channels. If my partner has cultivated a deep connection with his own Spirit, with consciousness, with the Source, I am not simply touching his body. I am entering into relationship with the entire field he has learned to hold. And he enters mine. For a moment, his capacity for surrender, presence, depth and connection becomes available within the field between us, while mine becomes available to him. We do not lose ourselves in this exchange, we become more ourselves.

His channel does not replace mine, it can expand what I am capable of receiving. My channel does not become his, it can open a doorway he could not open in exactly the same way alone. Two separate vertical connections meet through the horizontal connection between two human beings, and something larger becomes possible.

This is one of the deepest mysteries of sex: we enter another human being not in order to escape ourselves, but sometimes to reach dimensions of ourselves that we could not reach alone. 

A Man and a Woman moving through the Transition can reveal and heal one another through sex, through union in love, through the joining of their individual channels of connection with the Source. But healing here does not mean that one person arrives to repair what is broken in the other. No human being can do another person’s inner work for them. What we can do is create a field in which what has been hidden finally becomes possible to see, feel, hold and transform. Have you noticed any changed in you after being involved with someone? Have your life changed? 

There are places within us that solitude cannot reach. We can meditate for years, understand our childhood wounds intellectually, work with our shadows, learn our patterns and become extraordinarily self-aware, and then another human being comes close enough to touch the exact place where all of that understanding disappears. Suddenly there is jealousy, fear, shame, possessiveness, the terror of abandonment, the fear of being consumed, the inability to receive, the impulse to control, the instinct to disappear. Intimacy reveals where our consciousness has not yet reached.

Sex can reveal these places with extraordinary precision because it asks for something the mind can endlessly avoid: presence inside vulnerability. To be deeply intimate means allowing another person close to the places where we are least defended. The body remembers what the intellect has forgotten. It remembers rejection, humiliation, abandonment, being unwanted, being used, being silenced, being afraid to need, being afraid to surrender. And sometimes it remembers something even older than our personal story: inherited ideas about masculine and feminine, sexuality, power, shame, purity, domination and submission that have travelled through families and cultures for generations.

This is why sacred sexual union is not always soft, beautiful or blissful. Sometimes it brings us directly into the underworld. The person we love can become the one who opens the door to our deepest Darkness, precisely because we have allowed them close enough to find it! Only there you can start a real journey. 

And if both people remain conscious, if neither runs immediately into blame, punishment, manipulation or withdrawal, that Darkness can become material for transformation. I can begin to recognize what your presence awakens in me without making you responsible for everything I feel. You can meet what I awaken in you without demanding that I become smaller so that you never have to encounter it. We become witnesses to one another’s descent and, sometimes, companions in the return.

Then masculine and feminine do something far more profound than simply complement one another. They expose one another. They challenge one another. They call forward capacities that may have remained dormant without this encounter. The masculine may reveal to the feminine where she fears surrender, structure, protection or being fully seen... the feminine may reveal to the masculine where he fears feeling, receptivity, tenderness, vulnerability, or the loss of control... until he reaches the point where a decision can no longer be postponed and must be made in truth. And here lies the paradox: you surrender control by surrendering to what is true, yet only then do you become capable of making a real choice. As long as you are controlling the outcome, protecting what you have, managing other people’s reactions, calculating consequences, avoiding loss, preserving the familiar, you are not entirely choosing... you are negotiating with fear. The moment you stop trying to control what truth may cost you and allow yourself to know what you already know, choice becomes possible. You may still choose to stay. You may choose to leave. You may choose something entirely unexpected. But for the first time, the decision comes from truth rather than from the architecture you built to avoid it. In surrendering the illusion of control, you recover something far more powerful: your agency... And these currents exist within both people, which means that through meeting the other, we are also meeting the abandoned masculine and feminine within ourselves.

This is what I mean by healing one another’s Darkness. I do not take your Darkness away. I meet the part of myself that your Darkness illuminates. You do not rescue me from mine. You remain present enough that I can finally encounter what I once had to exile from myself. Through that encounter, something fragmented can begin to return home.

Sex in the new reality therefore becomes a spiritual practice not because we make it sacred with candles, rituals, beautiful words or spiritual concepts. LOL It becomes sacred through the quality of consciousness we bring into it. Two Souls open through one another. Two bodies become mirrors. Two nervous systems learn presence. Two histories enter the same field. Two channels connected vertically to the Higher meet horizontally through love.

And those “empty spaces” within us were never meant to be filled by another person at all. Perhaps intimacy does something more interesting: another Soul enters close enough to illuminate those spaces, and through the connection between us and the connection each of us maintains with the Higher, we discover what was waiting there all along. Then we are no longer using sex to escape emptiness.  We are entering it together and discovering that it contains a doorway.

There is another side to this kind of sexual union, and it is far more difficult to speak about.... When a Soul moving toward greater consciousness repeatedly enters sexual intimacy with someone with whom there is no longer a deep inner attunement, the conflict may eventually become impossible to ignore. The mind may continue negotiating long after the body has stopped consenting in the deeper sense. The relationship may still function. There may be affection, loyalty, shared history, children, responsibilities, friendship, even genuine love. Yet something essential has withdrawn from the sexual field.

This is one of the great tragedies that can happen when transformation runs directly through a family. One person changes while the other remains attached to the reality in which the relationship was originally created. Neither person necessarily becomes wrong or bad. They may simply cease to meet in the same inner place.

And sometimes almost everything except sexuality can survive that separation. Two people can cooperate, care for one another, raise children, share a home, protect each other, laugh together and become almost like deeply familiar companions. But the body knows the difference between companionship and the true union. Sexual intimacy cannot always be negotiated back into existence simply because the structure of the relationship still requires it.

The body may begin to close. Desire slowly disappears. Touch becomes something to tolerate rather than something toward which the body naturally moves. The act becomes a task, a check box to fulfill, because this is what we are supposed to do. During sex, a person may find themselves leaving internally... imagining someone else during the act, watching the experience from somewhere outside themselves, waiting for it to finish, or feeling profoundly depleted afterward. Sometimes the body carries stress in very physical ways, and recurring discomfort or other symptoms deserve both compassionate attention and appropriate medical care. Whatever language we use for it, psychological, somatic, relational, energetic, the body may eventually express a conflict that the conscious mind has spent years trying to manage.

But there is another configuration, and maybe an even more complicated one. Sometimes the energetic split does not run only between two people. Sometimes there is a third person in the field. One relationship may carry history, obligation, security, fear, family, identity and the architecture of an entire life, while another carries recognition, awakening, desire, truth, vulnerability and an entirely different possibility of becoming. Then enormous amounts of energy begin circulating through a system that nobody is willing, or able, to bring into truth.

The third person does not even have to understand what is happening. They may be completely unaware of the deeper reality moving around them. They may simply continue relating from the world they know, holding tightly to the structure that gives their life meaning and security. Yet as long as one person attempts to remain energetically and sexually connected to incompatible realities at the same time, the entire field becomes distorted.

Energy that could have moved toward intimacy, creation, healing and transformation is consumed on the other side by concealment, guilt, enormous fear, separation, divided loyalty, maintaining appearances, control and managing consequences and endlessly postponing the decision that truth is asking for. It becomes almost like a grinder.

Something powerful enters the system, but instead of being allowed to move somewhere, toward union, separation, creation, grief, truth, or even a conscious ending, it is ground again and again through the same unresolved structure. It can begin to feel as though two completely different fields exist at the same time: one carrying extraordinary clarity, recognition, expansion and pure consciousness, while the other is saturated with fear, attachment, obligation, control, history and distortion. And the most confusing part is that when you continue moving sexually between these fields, both can feel real.

You can no longer easily tell what belongs to love and what belongs to attachment, what is genuine responsibility and what is fear, what is compassion and what is guilt, what you consciously choose and what you are simply terrified to lose. Sexual energy keeps reactivating both realities, feeding both bonds and returning you again and again to the same internal contradiction. The stronger the sexual connection (especially created out of fear of loss and guilt), the harder it may become to hear your own truth beneath everything circulating through the system.

Sometimes the only way to discover what is actually true for you is to stop feeding one field, or even both fields, sexually for a while. Not as punishment, not as manipulation, and not as a strategy to force someone else to choose. But as an experiment, as an act of radical discernment. Remove the sexual exchange and allow the energetic noise to settle. Stop using another body to confirm what you believe you feel. Stop allowing desire, chemistry, obligation, familiarity or fear to make the decision for you.

Then watch what remains... Which connection continues to exist when sex is removed? Which one becomes clearer rather than weaker? Where does your body naturally move when nobody is pulling on it? What do you miss: the person, or what they provide? What survives when there is no orgasm, no physical reassurance, no possession, no secret meeting, no relational or religious duty, no familiar ritual holding the relationship together? And most importantly: who are you when neither sexual field is telling you who you are?

Only from that silence may it become possible to recognize what was consciousness, what was distortion, what was love, what was fear and what, beneath all of it, was actually true for you. 

Desire generates energy. Love generates energy. Fear consumes it. Secrecy consumes it. Obligation consumes it. Control consumes it. And the more powerful the connection, the more energy there is for the system to consume. and in polarized connection, it is a dead-end... Degradation... the amount of energy is given for healing and transformation is spoiled on managing fear... This is why a triangle can sometimes continue for years. It may appear from the outside that nothing is happening because no final decision is being made, while internally an enormous amount is happening all the time. Everyone is being fed by the structure in some way, and everyone is also paying for it.

The tragedy is that the person standing between two realities may believe that refusing to choose is the way to preserve both. Yet non-choice is itself a choice, and it has an energetic consequence. Instead of allowing either relationship to become fully true, the person keeps both suspended. One cannot completely die, the other cannot completely be born.

And eventually the body may become the place where this impossibility can no longer be hidden. Because sexual energy wants movement. It wants creation, union, transformation, truth. When it is continuously generated inside a structure designed primarily to prevent change, something has to happen to it. It is the only life force we have as human beings. Either it transforms the structure or the structure begins consuming the people inside it.

If you are moving through the Transition, you can no longer choose someone who is "asleep" as your sexual partner or who is continuing "feeding the fear machine". You will pay for it with your energy and your strength... with your potency - on all levels, you will see impotence in your life and in your body... you will slow your own development and may even pay with your health. For your Spirit, this is a violation. I came to my own conclusion - choose the person your open heart has called toward you, otherwise the energetic price may be enormous. You can no longer afford sexual intimacy with people whose energy is too far removed from your own. This is part of the price of the Transition. You can no longer enter the mystery of sex against your Heart, because in doing so, you betray and violate yourself.

This is precisely why so many of you are losing sexual desire, why you may find yourself physically unable to have sex with a partner whom your Heart has not accepted or you "see the grinder behind", with someone who is no longer vibrationally synchronized with you...